Last night was New Years Eve and it went the opposite of the way it should have gone from the very beginning, despite my New Years preparations. I spent my day reading, meditating, letting go of 2019, and planned to welcome the new year with an open mind and heart. I had the best day, but then I had to go to my new job. I, for the second time in the last seven days had decided for one-hundred per cent certainty that I was going to quit my job I’ve had for twenty-three days. I have only worked eight of those twenty-three days. I absolutely hate it. I don’t need to feel guilty about quitting. I owe them nothing. It just is not working out for me.
I think this authentic text message says it all. I feel like I do not need to and should not go into too much detail of the toxic feeling environment because it will put it back into my focus and encourage that momentum in the wrong direction. Before I sent this text message I was anxious. I had already known for certain last week that I felt again last night and also today – that I don’t want to work here. My mind said it, my body felt it, I heard it.
Today I made it my intention to sort out my thoughts and so I laid on the floor and listened to the sound of the fan in order to help clear my mind. I know from listening to Abraham Hicks that it is beneficial to get yourself into a good vibration before making decisions so my mind is clear and I am more in the receiving mode. I decided to stop searching for an answer and let it come to me and that is exactly what happened. So when the message came I was prepared to write down exactly what it said.
After writing down what my mind was telling me, I knew I had to listen. I asked a question and I received an answer, so that propelled me forward into sending that text message when I arrived at the gas station. A few minutes later I realized it had been delivered at 4:44pm, which I took as total confirmation to quit my job. The spiritual meaning of 444 is that I am in line with the universe and to listen to my intuition, basically my guides were congratulating me on making the right choice. They furthered this congratulations minutes later by showing me the word ‘vortex’ underneath another number 4, telling me that I am in the right direction of my true path.
I have been tip toeing around the idea of spirituality for the last few years, but only in the last few months have I finally dove in head first. Since beginning my journey, my life has started to improve, and so have my borderline symptoms. I can see and feel the mental pathways changing and adapting in my mind creating new thoughts, ideas, and love towards myself. I’m learning that being an outcast is a gift, not a curse.
I’m starting to feel like
Jim Carrey, the man that plays Jim Carrey’s character on Earth, the extension of source in the body of Jim Carrey. If you don’t know what I am talking about, look up some more recent information on Jim Carrey. People who are not yet awakening call him crazy, but I think he is just tapped in, tuned in, and turned on. This causes a belief in my mind that I am the only one who thinks the way I think and this is a thought I have that I would like to change by following and adapting it. I call this a mind purge where I start with the lower thought and start to redirect and reshape it to form the idea I truly want. It’s totally free flowing and sometimes doesn’t even make sense, but it works. ::knuckles cracking:: Here we go…
I am the only one who thinks the way I think. I feel like an outcast. I feel alone. I feel like the only one of my kind. The way I am vibrating right now, I am not attracting the people I want. I am not attracting the people I want. I want to attract different people. I want to attract different people. I want people who think like me. I want people who like me. I want people who care about me. I want people who appreciate me and are considerate of me. I want someone I can trust. Everything I want is coming to me. That was a big jump, what happened? I looked up at the TV and saw a woman swinging on the most beautiful beach and I started thinking about my trip to Europe. Wow, that really propelled me forward in a positive direction to jump from such a negative thought of being the only one that thinks like me all the way to everything I want is coming to me. This makes me feel better, happier, vibrating higher. I am grateful to be on this new journey of working on my true self and my mind.